dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She bit a glass in half.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
