Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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