He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
