I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize
