Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
