doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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