i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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