youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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