Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize