sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
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That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
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well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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