I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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