Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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