I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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