Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
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