I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It's blow job season.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
