I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
