Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
