11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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