the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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