why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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