I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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