dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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