Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
