That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
