I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
BRING THE BAGELS
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize