Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
