I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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