He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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