watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
