whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize