you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
She even gives head with a lisp.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
