he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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