we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You're a waste of cheezeits
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
