I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
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You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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