sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize