You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
she told me i tasted like america
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
