I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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