Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
