you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
