So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
