I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize