i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize