Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
