Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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