Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel