Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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