I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
