I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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