So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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