Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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