The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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